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to a sad me

reposting a found poem from back in the day. dare i say, there are some choice lines underneath the angst...

one year ago you were living in a saltwater room

fresh off the plane (for you had just been dragged 16 hours across the arctic circle)

before your bags arrived you already knew

heart in your stomach you made it a point to get out of your room

crunched through the piss-stained slush ignoring the cavernous sobs

poured out laughter so sweet it felt bitter

but the minute they turned away the tears came for you

your friends saw you cracking but didn’t know what to say

how could they when home for them was less than a country away

accented by the cold smack of winter water

the days piled up like the snow around washington square park

as you retreated into the artificial warmth of your room

you were sad so you read books that reminded you of home

skipped dinner so you could mope in bed with your rose-tinted glasses

remembering times with friends that felt like family

the days piled up like the snow around washington square park

at long last spring came and your mood began to lift with the temperature

but it was a late spring that year and you were scarred by ice

from then on the memory of snow would haunt you

the constant danger of slipping back into hibernation

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